maybe i will be brought back to the moments in my life where i was with my soulmate. the true ones. and i won't have to wither in the world where love is dead and my body is the only part that matters

my suicide date is approaching slowly. I think my plan will be to overdose on meds and see where it takes me. maybe ill be a vegetable and i can forget everything that ever was. good, good

i think ill do what i did last year and decide mid-november. see if there's any more reason to keep going or not after all of it

im kind of considering it. would it be good to od and hope for the best? i dont think i could lodge a knife into me

one day, maybe, ill be enough for someone to love. someone who accepts my diet and won't shame me for not being able to scarf down food. maybe ill find that comfort when my energy is transferred into the universe

god i sound so dramatic now. no wonder he posted me on twitter. if i genuinely stopped being an actual pussy and ended it i wouldn't have to recognize this feeling. it just purely wouldn't exist

i feel really sick to my stomach. im waking up a lot, like a lot a lot. i don't feel like being on this planet anymore. everyday is the same constant loop. i will never be enough for anyone. i hate being a stupid girl. i hate this body. hell, i even resent my feet now. i don't even care if i go to hell for killing myself. i wanted to save people but what is there worth saving for anymore? all ill be is a doll tossed around in the system. used for pleasure and nothing else. i just want to become nothing so i don't have to feel anything anymore. i will never find true love. no one will comfort me the way i desire. no one will love me for me. people are horrible and ill probably be sexually assaulted way worse later in life. and be slut shamed for it. i hate being a girl. i hate that it hinders everything i do. a part of me wishes i could just melt into nothing and stop being a pussy. i may just sh tonight 10x harder to stop the crying. i could have been so mature. i could've been everything, but im not even enough for someone to chase after or for someone to leave other girls for. im just a stupid [censored] and i cannot wait till i am gone. maybe another girl out there will carrying on my dream and save the world.

i think being off the platform has helped me be healthier and especially given me more time to do my responsibilities. i now feel capable of doing things and completing them

weirdly enough reading their messages triggers them to wake up. maybe i should uhh...keep off of this?

im glad the others have been speaking more internally than externally on here. maybe its progress haha?? :'

my head really hurts...owie..

I have a good feeling today, I feel really productive!!

I'm really excited for auditions wehehehe

Maybe with curiosity, you could be found. Or maybe curiosity kills the cat. Either way, treat it as your sanctuary and personal garden. Grow from the horrible words you write and blossom into something beautiful.

Are you awaiting someone, a11i3?